Something easily internalized

I've come to realize that the personal/public spaces of a blog are neither sufficiently private enough for my vexings about things like my fishbone swallowing incident, nor are they public enough to be of any quality or interest to my fellow friends who often visit from across the globe. On this the last day of June, I've decided to turn a new leaf -- hence the new green look. The blog now reflects a greener consciousness that I'm developing (coinciding with our church's greening attempts). I'm also committing myself to thinking about and thus writing about experiences related to my history, my personal narrative about being Vietnamese and being American. I've never quite allowed myself to delve deep into this writing because, well, the blog never seems like the place. I've permitted myself to blog about music, poetry, and films that in some way touch upon all the issues of identity, narrative, history, family, etc., but those things seemed too random, piecemeal. I've not shared my own poetry on this blog, and perhaps witholding that part of me has always kept me safe. While I will not be sharing on a daily basis what I have or have not eaten or swallowed, I hope this blog will offer something more easily internalized (and not just fishbone stories either).

30 June: water dance

The final image I have for the last day of June was taken on a cold night when we were visiting Victoria Peak -- where we were able to view the whole of Hong Kong hustling and bustling at midnight at our feet. Outside in one of the courtyards was a little spot where they had a bit of water dance -- synched w/ music and lights, to the delight of many young (and old) children.

He has taken the country off track...

President Bush has become what he said he would be, a uniter: both conservatives and liberals are united in thinking that he has taken the country off track.

Since 9/11 Americans ahve been vulnerable to a politics of fear. A number of presidential candidates are only too eager to play on these fears as they try to present themselves as tough on terrorism.

Christians should have something to bring to this discussion, since they know that there is no absolute safety or security and that it is dangerous to attempt to establish absolute security; that we cannot put ultimate faith in technology, the military or government leaders; that there are worse fates than death, such as the loss of our souls; that we should regard all peoples, even our enemies, as children of God with whom we should engage;

and that we need to work together with others to try to resolve the problems of poverty, disease, hunger and environmental degradation.

- "Taking Inventory", The Christian Century, June 26, 2007

I may have a condition...

WebMD says: "Older children and adults may eat inedible items to seek attention or as a result of a psychiatric condition."

I didn't swallow the fishbone to seek attention, so it must be b/c of a psychiatric condition.

"A swallowed fishbone penetrating the oesophagus"

OK, on Wednesday I swallowed a fishbone. I just found this fascinating article written by Sabah M. Al-Shukry, about a female patient who came to Rustaq Hospital, Rustaq, Sultanate of Oman. The abstract:

40-year-old woman presented with the history of swallowing a fishbone one hour earlier. Since the patient was swallowing normally and the X-ray results were negative, she was reassured and sent home. Twenty days later, when the patient again presented with pain and tenderness in her neck, the fishbone was detected in the left sternomastoid muscle, and removed under local anaesthesia.

She returned three times before they could find anything and do anything. Like her, I am swallowing normally -- solids and liquids -- and there is no painful swelling. Examination of the throat does not present any abnormalities, and no foreign objects are visible. Patient is in good condition, and vital signs are normal.

I doubt that my fishbone is as long as hers (which was 3 cm), but I have no doubt I'm "presenting" with the same signs. Should I go to the doctors now? I'm such a chicken!

And then, there's this article about the aorto-eosophageal:

This report describes perforation of the oesophagus after eating fish complicated by perforation of the aorta six days later. The patient had not knowingly swallowed a fish bone. Aorto-oesophageal fistula is almost universally fatal. In the case described here, the fistula was demonstrated on contrast computed tomography before surgery, thus informing surgical management. The patient is the eighth reported survivor.

Now, I'm wondering, does anyone ever intentionally swallow a fishbone? Yikes.

Lodged and refusing to budge

Fishbone swallowing incident update:

It's still there. I've been coughing an awful lot since Wednesday night, bringing up phlegm (yuck, sorry you had to hear that), but the stupid fisbone won't go away. It's just lodged in my throat. When I called the Kaiser advice hotline Wednesday night (ca. 1:00 a.m.), the registered nurse on call said it's no big deal b/c it happens all the time.

"Are you having difficulty breathing?" No, ma'am.

"Is it painful when you swallow?" No, ma'am.

Well, it is now a bit more uncomfortable, like I have this thing hitched to my esophagus lining, but it's not painful when I swallow. I just feel it in my throat.

What should I do? Anyone out there who's had a fishbone stuck in their throat for more than 24 hours? (And, no, I don't think it's just scratched b/c I did feel the bone - don't ask me how, but I did.) Au secours!

29 June: vortex

This was taken at the airport when I arrived in Hong Kong (Jan 2007). In many respects, the HK airport is exactly like any other airport that I've visited, and in others, well, it's completely different. I miss being in that different space b/c it forces you to be on your toes, to be alert, open.

Thi Tham

Moi viec da xay ra
co biet bao dieu la
Em sinh ra tren doi
mang lai bao niem vui
Em lon len xinh dep
hon het moi bong hoa
Mot ngay lai troi qua
anh la khach qua duong
Gap nhau rat tinh co
cai nhin ua vao mat
Dam duoi trao cho nhau
ngon lua tinh chay ruc
Hai trai tim thon thuc
duong nhu nghe tieng goi
Bong hong nho cua anh
thi tham nhu muon noi
Ta yeu nhau suot doi.

- Tho cua Lam Quynh

Mọi việc đã xảy ra
có biết bao điều lạ
Em sinh ra trên đời
mang lại bao niềm vui
Em lớn lên xinh đẹp
hơn hết mọi bông hoa
Một ngày lại trôi qua
anh là khách qua đường
Gặp nhau rất tình cờ
cái nhìn uà vào mắt
Đắm đuối trao cho nhau
ngọn lửa tình cháy rực
Hai trái tim thổn thức
dường như nghe tiếng gọi
Bông hồng nhỏ của anh
thì thầm như muốn nói
Ta yêu nhau suốt đời.

- Thơ của Lâm Quỳnh

Mua He Cho Toi

Mua he o trong toi
Goi chut gio hiem hoi mang noi nho
Ngay xua ay, tam hon toi be nho
Trong tan truong ron ra ao mau may
Mua he o trong toi
Ngay thang xua khong con trong noi nho
Uoc mo nao, bay gio thoi tan vo
Da het roi uoc mong lai xa bay
Mua he o trong toi
Trong soi nang may mua gom gop lai
Mau nang cho toi theo thoi gian gia coi
Chang ngot ngao goi lai tuoi tho toi.

- Tho cua Thach Thao

Mùa hè ở trong tôi
Gợi chút gió hiếm hoi mang nỗi nhớ
Ngày xưa ấy, tâm hồn tôi bé nhỏ
Trống tan trường rộn rã áo màu mây
Mùa hè ở trong tôi
Ngày tháng xưa không còn trong nỗi nhớ
Ước mơ nào, bây giờ thôi tan vỡ
Đã hết rồi ước mộng lại xa bay
Mùa hè ở trong tôi
Trong sợi nắng mấy mùa gom góp lại
Màu nắng cho tôi theo thời gian già cỗi
Chẳng ngọt ngào gởi lại tuổi thơ tôi.

- Thơ của Thạch Thảo

28 June: tombstones

A short while before I left Vietnam to return to the U.S., I visited An Tu Vien, the Christian cemetery in Lai Thieu, where my (maternal) great-grandparents are buried. This image you see here is a small section of the very large cemetery, and it used to belong to the Chinese churches, but they then shared it with the Vietnamese Protestant churches, eventually selling it into our care. It was the very first time that I ever saw my grandparents' site. I went with Chu Dan, sitting on the back of his motorbike for the one hour drive out to Lai Thieu. Of course, we had to wear helmets and took all the necessary precautions. It was a terrible imposition on him, especially with his busy schedule, but of course Co Hoa Trang did nothing but insist that I let them take me. The weather was hot and humid. The cemetery was deserted. I brought a notebook and pen, a videocamera to record the day's events, and a digital camera to capture my photo next to the tombstone of the grandparents I never knew. I did not bring flowers. I took home photographs.

An ca mac xuong: fishbone

I have a fishbone stuck in my throat. It is, I think, embedded in the lining of my esophagus, deep enough that I can't dislodge it no matter how much bread I eat, but shallow enough that I can feel the bone sometimes when I swallow. (No, it's not just scratched but it really is there.)

I went to lunch at Cesar's with a friend. We decided to share a salad of white potatoes and smoked trout. Of course, I ate and talked and talked and ate, and then with some gusto swallowed the fishbone. I want to say I did chew -- I remember being taught in pre-school to masticate my food before swallowing, but who knows what happened, b/c along with bread, potatoes, and trout -- I ate the bone, too.

After some consideration, it seemed not a good idea to sue the place (they serve excellent tapas and great wine) because they'd probably ban me from ever entering their business again. Besides, I would have become the biggest joke in Berkeley -- known evermore as She Who Does Not Chew Her Food.

It doesn't hurt when I eat -- in fact, I've tested it several times since this incident occurred at lunch. I've eaten grapefruit, rice, rice noodles, chocolate, bread, dried mangoes, twix bars, but nothing will do the trick. (Are you laughing b/c I've managed to eat so much even with a fishbone lodged in my throat? Well, I suppose I deserve that.) I've also swallowed a few liters of water. Except for having to use the bathroom every five minutes or so, nothing has changed. The trout bone remains fixed.

I distinctly remember one episode of House in which Dr. House ingeniously discovered that a wooden toothpick, swallowed by a patient they were trying to cure, was the root of all problems. Would it be surprising for them to write an episode in which a patient (played by yours truly?) accidentally swallows a fishbone and then her life is forever changed...? I can play this well, b/c I've done this before -- twice, at least.

My first vivid memory of swallowing fishbone dates back to my early years, when I was about 4 or 5, still living on Duong Vuon Chuoi, in province 3, of Saigon. I swallowed a fishbone during dinner, and was scared out of my wits. We lived in small alleyways, and I remember my mother taking me by the hand, walking through the narrow alleys towards what must have been a nearby doctor's house. I can't recall whether we ever reached the place, but this was my last memory: my mother, needing to soothe my anxiety, asked if I wanted to pray, and we stood there in the narrow pathway as dusk was falling, praying that God would allay my fears. It seems silly now, and I'm sure my mother was merely playing along to ease a child's fears. Yet, there is so much preciousness in this particular memory that I have to say thank God for that little fishbone.

27 June: orchid

Carrying water

Do you see these steps? There are over 270 steps from the bottom to the top where the Batu Caves are located. These gentlemen are carrying bottles of water up all those 270 steps. I would have to say that with each step, the bottles gain a pound in weight, and about 10 bucks in dollars (well, not really, but it's practically so). Those are expensive waters by the time you climb to the top of the steps. And it is very high. You'll see it when I show the next set of photos. For now, I just want to admire everything that is in these men who have to trudge up and down carrying water to sell (of course, they're going to make tourists pay an arm and a leg for each bottle, too, but that's beside the point).

Have I already said that those are the highest steps I have ever climbed? At the time that I was climbing them, it felt as if I was going to topple over at any second, and of course, I would have crushed quite a few monkeys if I'd ever roll down to the bottom at step 1. I think that by step 150, I was wanting to crawl on my hands and legs, but the steps and handrails were so digusting that I couldn't just crawl. The handrails were truly disgusting -- the sweat, dirt, and whatever else that people have transferred onto those rails -- ugh. I don't even want to think about it. But, I had to hand on for dear life. It felt as if I had a death grip on those handrails, and I am ashamed to say that I practically fought with elderly but gung-ho tourists who also wanted to use the handrail. There were many times during the climb when I had to move from one side of the railing to the other, and those feel feet that I had to cross as I was going up the steps were agonizing. My hands are sweating even now as I think about that experience.

In the end, it was one of the most incredible experiences of my trip to Malaysia.

Dutch church windows

Stained glass windows inside the oldest Dutch church building in Melaka, Malaysia

It is like a life...

I didn't realize until now that the photo is dated June 26, 2005, and I'm HATposting it on June 26, 2007. Exactly two years. Yikes, how time flies...

Lord, how the day passes! It is like a life, so quickly when we don't watch it, and so slowly if we do. - John Steinbeck

Minh khong co de y khi dang hinh nay len blog, nhung tam anh chup vao ngay 26 thang 06 nam 2005, va hom nay la 26 thang 06 nam 2007. Hai nam truoc, minh dang ngoi trong nha tho o Vung Tau, ngoi tro chuyen giua khong khi tuoi dep cua Vung Tau (the smile of the sea!). Quay qua, quay lai, da trai qua 2 nam roi. Thoi gian troi nhanh the!

26 June: tình thương trong hộp

Neu TY co the duoc dong khuon bo vao hop, minh nghi day la cai hop dung vua du tinh thuong. Tam hinh nay duoc chup vao mot buoi chieu mat me tai Vung Tau. Ban B va HAT da di lang thang o ngoai duong khap pho, di den ngoi nha tho de thuong nay. Buoi chieu hom do, minh da dung chan tai day mot thoi gian kha lau. Do la mot ky niem that quy bao, ma bay gio tam kg viet den nhe (co ve vi HAT khong muon xam pham vao cai giay phut tham lang do -- cac ban dung buon khi nghe HAT noi vay nhe. Khong phai kg muon chia se voi cac ban dau, nhung doi khi co nhung secret space ma minh kg co the mo ta duoc).

Khi buoc vao Nha Tho, gap duoc cai hop tinh thuong nay treo lo lung tren tuong. No la mot cai hop rat don so, va minh nghi nguoi tho moc da lam ra cai hop Tinh Thuong nay chac la mot nguoi co nep song rat binh di, nhung cung co tam hon lang man, co ve hoi "idealistic" mot ti. Du sao di nua, minh cam thay nhu day la mot su nhac nho rat lon. Khi dang hien mot cai gi do, khong phai la so luong it hoac nhieu, nhung la tam long cua minh duoc do luong bang cai gi. Bo vao hop TT mot dong xu, co le cai thung nay se qua nho, vi co the dong xu co mang nang Tinh Thuong cua nguoi giver. Bo vao mot to 100,000vnd, co the cai hop nay qua to, vi to giay 100,000vnd chang chua chat bao nhieu tinh thuong.

Nghi den viec nay, lam minh chot nho den Campaign de eradicate poverty. Hien bay gio co nhung tre em dang song qua ngay voi chi $1 USD? Moi ngay, chi co 16,000vnd ma thoi... eradication cua su ngheo kho va doi kem o tren trai dat kg qua suc cua minh. Minh co du tien, co kha nang, de tieu diet poverty va hunger. Minh co du y chi khong? Cai hop dung Tinh Thuong nay qua to cho chung ta, hoac la qua nho cho chung ta?

This photo was taken when I was in Vung Tau with my friend B. She and I visited this cute little church, and we spent a long while just sitting in the pews to talk. I noticed the little offering box hanging by itself on the wall. The lettering, if you'll notice, says "tình thương" (tinh thuong, i.e. "love"). It makes me wonder sometimes whether our boxes are too small or too big for our Love(s). It gives me new wonder as I think on "love in a box."

25 June: hẽm way

Hien bay gio, minh dang chuan bi buoc toi mot cong viec moi, chua biet se di dau, chua biet cong viec se thanh hay khong, nhung minh van buoc voi duc tin. Nhieu khi duong di khong co thang nhu duong hem nay, va doi khi duong di cang xa hon va toi tam hon rat nhieu, nhung minh van tiep tuc buoc di....

24 June: cửa sổ

Moi lan nhin vao mot cua so nhu la cai nay day, minh cam thay nhu dang nhin vao mot tam hon nao rat bi mat. Cua so nay chua day nhung "mystery" trong bong toi. Chi co mot, hai reflection cua anh den tu ben trong. Minh tu hoi, o ben trong co nhung gi? Bong toi che day bao nhieu cai "mystery", bao nhieu cai bi mat? Con nua, nhung nguoi o phia trong nhin ra ngoai thi thay gi? Co thay duoc nguoi con gai xa la, dung cam may camera chup hinh, co gang ngam xem "ong kin" co thau xuyen cai toi tam do hay khong...?

23 June: untitled

22 June: country waters

This was shot as I was walking across one of the monkey bridges. It amazes me that I was able to stop, click a photo, and never fell off. The view was beautiful. You can't tell from the photo, but the humidity and the heat was thick; the water's reflection creates the illusion of crisp freshness, as if we were standing with our hair being blown by light breezes. But in fact, the air was heavy, like it was weighted down. And, it was not silent like this photo appears -- we were heading into a small section of the wildlife reserve and there were winged creatures of all kinds flying about. They were pretty verbal and expressive of their displeasure (maybe?) at our presence. Every once in a while, I could see a white pair of wings taking off from a tree or a bush. It was quite amazing.

Who are Faithful America

Together we are a progressive, inclusive, and responsive interfaith electronic advocacy community dedicated to providing a powerful collective voice to help advance the cause of compassion and justice in public policy.

Faithful Americans include Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims, Baha’is, to name a few. Many express their faiths in individual ways. Yet all of us share a common bond - when it comes to government, we believe our faith does matter. Our voices are needed. Our values must be reflected in our nation’s public policies

A program of the National Council of Churches, USA, FaithfulAmerica.org is made up of persons who believe that one’s faith - however broadly or uniquely expressed - has a word to say about our nation’s government and its priorities.

Cau chuyen cua ONE

Cac ban men, mot vai hom truoc, co mot nguoi ban cua minh da hoi tham ve ONE.ORG, va da nho HAT giai thich them ve trang mang cua ONE campaign. Den hom nay, HA da duoc han hanh ke cho them mot vai nguoi khac biet ve cai global campaign de tieu diet poverty. Bay gio thi HAT nghi rang da den luc minh post nhung gi HAT da viet trong la thu cho Bu, de cho cac ban khac cung co co hoi de biet them ve cai campaign nay. Roi day, neu co thieu gi thi xin moi cac ban hay giup HAT ma bo tuc nhe...

Vao nam 2000, tat ca nhung nuoc o trong Quoc Hoi (la United Nations?)
da hop lai va tao ra 8 "Millennium Development Goals" (8 MDGs), voi muc dich (giao uoc giua cac quoc gia?) de giai quyet nhung nan de quan trong nhat cua toan quoc. Muc dich cua su ket hop nay rat tao bao -- tat ca dieu dong y rang nhung nan de nhu doi kem, ben dich SIDA, v.v. dieu la nhung nan de "solvable" voi nhung kha nang cua tung quoc gia. Van de la, minh co du quyet tam hay khong. Quoc Hoi quyet dinh rang toi nam 2015, ho nhat dinh phai dat duoc 8 goals (la muc tieu?). Neu muon doc them ve 8 MDGs, hay xem trang nay cua Quoc Hoi.

Moi nuoc (tu Phap den Hoa Ky den Duc den cac nuoc Phi chau, v.v.) deu co nhung ke hoach rieng de giup ho dat duoc 8 MDGs. Co mot nhom goi la G8 (Group of Eight) la 8 quoc gia manh nhat trong kinh quoc te (world economy?) -- ho hop lai vao nhung dip G8 Summit de ban tinh ke hoach cua MDGs. (Tuan vua roi, ho hop tai Duc de noi ve World Poverty va World Climate). Cung co mot nhom khac goi la 05, la nam quoc gia ke la "largest emerging economies" -- la khong phai nhung nuoc manh nhat nhung ho dang phat trien. Gom trong 05 la: China, South Africa, Mexico, India, Brazil. Moi nuoc dieu hiep lai de thay doi tinh hinh decline, va tren nguyen tac la minh co du kha ang, nhung co nhung nuoc (nhu Hoa Ky) lai kg chiu lay het suc de cong tac (co nhieu ly do dc dua ra, nhung chang ly do nao hop ly het ca!).

Vao nam 2002, ong Secretary-General tai QH da commission UN Millennium Project de giup nhung countries tao ra nhung ke hoach rieng. Hay doc them ve Project nay tai day.

Tu UN Millennium Project co Millennium Campaign. Day la cach hay nhat va nhanh nhat de co dong ca the gioi de cung hop tac voi nhau. O tren toan quoc, co nhung nhom private va public hop lai de "tackle" 8 MDGs. Neu muon doc them ve Millennium Campaign, hay doc tai day.

Ghi chu: Hai hom truoc, HA da kiem duoc mot website rat hay, goi la GCAP: Global Call to Action Against Poverty. Sau khi luot trang nay, minh moi biet rang ONE.ORG la mot bo phan cua GCAP. Nhung nuoc nao muon tham gia trong campaign de eradicate poverty thi ho dang len GCAP, va neu cac ban vao trang nay, thi se biet duoc nhung website cua cac campaign cua nhung quoc gia tren toan cau.

Rieng o trong nuoc My thi co rat rat nhieu chuong trinh duoc thiet lap de giup minh hoan thanh muc tieu. HAT chi biet so so ve hai chuong trinh lon nhat (in my opinion thoi nhe!), la project (RED) va ONE.org. Theo minh nghi thi hai program nay co nhieu nguoi de y va biet den vi nhieu ly do khac nhau. (RED) duoc thiet lap boi ca nhac si Bono, cua ban nhac U2, la rat noi tien tren the gioi, va voi tieng noi manh me cua ong Bono, thi nhieu nguoi chu y den (RED). Chuong trinh nay chu yeu la de ung ho chien dau benh SIDA o tai Phi Chau.

ONE.org chu tam den rat nhieu nhieu "causes" hoac "concerns", nhung dieu rat quan trong ONE campaign la viec tieu diet (spelling?) poverty va chua benh va ngua benh AIDS. 2 y chinh cua ONE la: (1) voi su ung ho cua tung nguoi, chung ta co the giup do nhau ma tru tiet su doi kem; (2) yeu cau nuoc My contribute them 1% cua ngan sach cho OFFICIAL DEVELOPMENT ASSISTANCE de giup nhung developing countries dang can food, clean water, health, education, v.v.

Co nhieu nhom cung tham gia trong ONE campaign. Hai vi du cu the la Hoi Thanh Giam Ly tai Hoa Ky va Hoi Thanh Episcopal tai Hoa Ky. O trong nhung buoi Hoi Dong trong may nam truoc, ho da quyet dinh commit dang hien 1% de giup eradicate poverty.

Nhung, Quoc Hoi da tinh ra rang minh kg can phai donate 1% cua gross national income cua tung nuoc. Tu dau nien ky, cac nuoc da commit de gop phan ban cach contribute 0.7% cua ngan sach. Khong den 1%, chi la 0.7% ma thoi. So voi income moi nam cua nhung quoc gia, 0.7% kg nhieu lam, phai kg? Nhung, rat nhieu nuoc kg lam duoc. O trong HT Episcopal, ho yeu cau moi Hoi Thanh dang 0.7% cua su dang hien.

Hien bay gio thi minh den dau roi? 2007 la nua duong, vay thi minh xem co the dat duoc nhung muc tieu cua minh hay khong? Su that la, co rat nhieu nuoc da donate duoc 0.7%, va ho dang tiep tuc chien dau, nhung cung co nhieu nuoc kg commit duoc. Hoa Ky la mot example rat te, Bu oi. Nuoc My la 1 trong 8 quoc gia manh nhat, ma lai la 1 trong 5 nuoc cham tre nhat de gop phan. Ke tu 2006, nuoc My chi contribute duoc
0.022% ma thoi. Thay buon cuoi kg? La mot trong nhung nuoc manh me nhat, ma lai gop phan it nhat. Nhieu khi minh rat nan chi khi doc duoc nhung tin tuc nhu vay -- tu hoi minh tai sao lai la cong dan o trong mot nuoc vo nhan dao nhu vay.

HAT thay dieu can thiet la minh phai co gang len va kg give up duoc. Theo ONE campaign, chi can tung nguoi mot cuong quyet thi se thu huc duoc mot nguoi khac, va dan dan chung ta se dat duoc ma thoi. HAT rat vui khi duoc Bu hoi ve ONE.org, vi day la mot co hoi rat tot de HAT chia se voi nguoi khac.

Trong nhung trang web cua ONE.org, ho co mot phan goi la "Take Action". Trong do, ho neu ra nhung dieu minh co the lam de spread the news ve program nay. Trong 5 dieu minh co the lam, HA da lam duoc 4 dieu. Chinh vi HAT da lam dieu #4 (host a banner tren blog) nen Ban moi hoi HAT ve ONE.org, va vi Ban hoi, nen HAT moi co the lam dieu #2. Chi con dieu thu 5 la minh chua lam duoc thoi.

Con nua, dung quen noi cho nhung ban be biet nhe! Minh hay cung nhau tao ra mot the gioi moi!

HAT

21 June: monkey bridge "cau khi"

This is what is called "cầu khỉ" (cau khi) in Vietnamese. Translated literally one way, it means "bridge monkey." I've always delighted in the mental image of monkeys traipsing across these thin wooden sticks (or planks, in some cases), and I've found much fun in running along these things myself when I was in VN a few years ago. I don't know why monkey bridges are called monkey bridges and if I'd done my research, I'd have an explanation. Unfortunately, I do not know what "cầu khỉ" really refers to but I doubt it's because there ever were monkeys climbing these things.

This particular photo was taken when my cousins and I went south of Saigon to a place called Cần Giờ (Can Gio). We rode motorbikes for two hours, crossed the ferry, and drove by crews that were blasting their way through mountainsides. We ate waterchestnuts that were sold along the way by young children. (It was incredible, actually. I sat on the back of my cousin's motorbike (anh Thiên Lọc) and as we wound along the highway, I saw these young kids who looked like they were 8 or 9 or even younger standing on the side, spaced out several meters away from each other, holding dirty ice chests that held the cold water chestnuts. My cousin asked if I wanted some and then, in the middle of the thankfully deserted highway on top of this mountain, he spun a u-turn and stopped to buy a bag.)

We spent the day riding in canoes, fishing alligators, visiting bats in trees, fishing crabs (which we then purchased, cooked and then consumed at the fresh seafood restaurant), and getting bitten by mosquitoes. I crossed about four monkey bridges that day, and never fell off once. At the end of the day, we drove back in the pouring rain, with me wrapped in a blue plastic raincoat my cousin always packs in his motorcycle. We shared the road with semi-trucks and wild motorists who, like us, could not see 10 feet in front of them. Shielded behind my cousin, I could not see anything except for the rain, and on each side, far in the distance, I saw rain falling in dark streaks.

By the time we reached Saigon, we were drenched in rain, but we stopped for fresh squeezed nước mia (nuoc mia, sugar cane juice) and ate bò bía (fresh spring rolls).

It was the most terrifying and exciting experience. I wish I could do it all over again.

20 June: outside inside out

On the other side of the wooden gate is Chi Lin Nunnery in Kowloon, Hong Kong.

Buồn ơi, ta xin chào mi!

Các bạn ơi, hôm nay sao cảm thấy lòng mình buồn buồn...

Father figures: Together & Riding Alone

Hen ni zai yi qi
("Together", 2002, directed by Kaige Chen)

Starring Yun Tang as Liu Xiaochun
Peiqi Liu as Liu Cheng
Zhiwen Wang as Prof. Jiang
Kaige Chen as Prof. Yu

Qian li zou dan qi
("Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles", 2005, directed by Zhang Yimou)

starring Ken Takakura as Gou-ichi Takata
Lin Qiu as Lingo

Nothing happened by chance, and none happened with intention, either. It was by coincidence that all the following events occurred within these few days of June, when I and the rest of us are drawn to think about our fathers, brothers, uncles, grandfathers, godfathers, stepfathers, and any other kind of father figure.

In the movie Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles, I am reminded of what many fathers (including my own) have endured for the sake of their children. Takata embarks on a journey from Japan to China to finish a documentary film project for his son, who is dying from cancer, and from whom he has been estranged for many years. His intent was to finish filming for his son a performance of the Chinese folk opera "Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles". The journey takes him from one remote village to the next, not unlike the character Lord Guan, who travels thousands of miles b/c of his loyalty to a friend. Takata-san finds himself isolated in a foreign language, unable to make meaning except through the assistance of friends and acquaintances he makes along the way. He faces the distances between him and his son, mirrored in the geographical distances separating them. I watched this film thinking about the journeys my own father and grandfather have made. One such journey was to traverse from Vietnam to America and then back to Vietnam. The distances back to Vietnam have always been longer, farther, and harder to understand.

--

Last night, we attended a wake for Uncle FDC. He was a beautiful soul -- young, energetic, funny, and faithful. At 95 years old, he was still walking about Oakland Chinatown, still active in community activities, still a solid member of the church. His unexpected passing one week before Father's Day leaves a large vacuum in our midst. Our faith community has been upheld by Uncle F. for many years, and we continue to remember his wit, his love, and his energy.

--

A friend of mine and his wife just last week celebrated the coming home of their adopted baby son. His entrance into the world, and into their lives, brings joy and hope. I see it in my friend's face as he talks about his son, as he gives me details about their adoption process. The photographs I see of the family are filled not just with baby pics but also with the presences of grandmas, grandpas, and relatives, and friends. Good friends who know what it means to welcome a bright new baby into our midst. Having gone out to a b-ball game on his very first Dad's Day, my friend experienced for the first time the absence of his son, the feeling of being not whole.

--

Just last week, my friend's dad had to be hospitalized because of a lung infection. His many years of asthma has brought complications which he has continuously off and on. My friend and his sister take turns to visit him in the hospital, and even now I know not whether he has been released. The anxiety that I witness in my friend, the youngest son of five and whose eldest brother has been away from VN for almost two decades, is evident; he feels the burden of being the only son in the family. In one of our conversations, I foolishly ask if he'll be seeing his dad in the hospital on the morrow. And he said naturally. He brings breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and even visits when work allows him time away. Naturally.

--

Liu Xiaochun is a pretty excellent violinist. And his father Liu Cheng does everything he can to give the young child what he deserves -- love, attention, guidance in music training, fame, fortune, integrity, honor. After reaching Beijing, Liu Cheng immerses himself looking for ways to survive and for ways his son can flourish. Their life together is meager but full. There are always obstacles standing in the path of their success (greed, dishonor, loss -- almost everything that threatens their existence). They overcome these obstacles and are reconciled. They learn what it means to have everything and not each other. Father and son reconnect and I am so moved by the end of the film that I cry without reservation. But what amazed me the most in this movie, was not the beautiful music or the spare, precise acting. It was in the details of the father's character: The hunched over back that he carries b/c of years of servitude and humility, not just obeisance, to others of higher rank and fortune. The one little sock with a hole where the big toe protrudes, and which he has tied together with a little rubber band. The unabashed manner with which the father removes his shoes in front of the large, spotlessly clean condo of his son's rich and famous music instructor. All of these are images belonging to many father figures that I've seen and known. They are, to me, the most beautiful.

--

19 June: kaleidescope

18 June: red lanterns

This photo was snapped when I was in the dining hall of the YMCA in little India in Malaysia. It brings back images of the movie "Raise the Red Lantern." (I'm cheating slightly in my 30 posts in 30 days project b/c #1 this is photo I've previously posted, but which I delight in so much that I had to repost, and #2 b/c of ailing internect connectivity, I have not been able to post every morning like I'd hoped. My apologies.)

17 June: playing fort

This is a photo I took on the previous trip to south Malaysia. We seem to have built up many forts and then abandoned them to decay under the elements. In the face of this old fort, erected in Melacca on top of a hill overlooking the harbor, we are wasting away just like these facades.

16 June: among the sands

The past few days in Berkeley have been so hot that I'm reminded of the days I spent in Phan Thiet & Mui Ne in Vietnam... the hot sun, the warm sands, the sandy wind...

15 June: sky glider

14 June: up ended

13 June: splintered

This was taken last summer when our family visited Muir Woods up in North Bay. I don't know whether I took this photo or whether MA took this photo. Either way, it's a bit dark b/c night was falling and falling fast so we didn't have too many photo opportunities.

falling short of the goal

Comparing Official Development Assistance (ODA) figures between 2005 and 2006, in percentage of national income, the U.S. fell from 0.22 to 0.17, Italy from 0.29 to 0.20 and Japan from 0.28 to 0.25, while France and Germany stagnated at 0.47 and 0.36 respectively; only the U.K. increased from 0.47 to 0.52. Furthermore, a large share of aid delivered in the past two years has actually been debt relief (much of that for Iraq). The picture for sub-Saharan Africa is bleak; excluding debt relief, aid to the region is stagnant, and no poor country has seen the increase in aid that would enable it to achieve the Millennium Goals by 2015.

All we have to do is contribute 0.7% of our national income and we've regressed to 0.17%. It's not just tragic, it's absolutely shocking. This cannot continue, can it, if we want to be the change we wish to see in the world?

12 June: Rorschach blush

what do you see in this "inkblot"?

the will of a person translated into space

Two lines from poem "Truth to Materials" in The Return Message by San Francisco poet Tessa Rumsey.

The will of a person translated into space may result in an edifice architected
To reflect the world not as it appears, but as it was once dreamed to be: honest.

11 June: peek a boo

10 June: Deo Hai Van

Far in the distance is Deo Hai Van, winding its way between Nha Trang and Da Lat, Vietnam. The treacherous road is traversed by buses, vans, cars, and even stage coaches. I took this trip four times -- thrice when I was in Vietnam in 2004-2005 (and once was during a midnight run on a stage coach; imagine doing that at night! eek!) -- and one when I went to VN on the immersion trip in Jan '07. The sights were beautiful! but the tree is sort of in the way...

Eco-Justice Programs: Justice for God's Planet and God's People

A good friend of ours happens to be a professor teaching the Pacific School of Religion, and this professor forwarded a link to the Eco-Justice Programs office of the National Council of Churches. I encourage all of us to look at the work of the NCC EJP office to learn more about their attention to the concerns of environmental justice.

Given the recent decisions of the G8, I think it is even more important to read and understand and support the principles developed by the NCC. On their website, they say:

...the principles were developed by the National Council of Churches in conjunction with our interfaith community to outline the elements we feel must be addressed in any national climate change legislation. Though there may be other principles that would be appropriate, we feel that these are the essential faith principles that we must lift up as a community in our ministry to protect God’s planet and people.

That's what is important, folks. These are the essential faith principles that we must adhere to because the truth is we live in Creation -- we are a part of creation -- and it is our responsibility.

As one of the eight largest economies, as one of the 8 leading industrialized nations representing 65% of the world's economy (Wikipedia), the United States carries the responsibility of fixing the problems we created. We must do it. We are responsible for the world's preservation b/c we are living on borrowed goods and borrowed time -- borrowed from our children's future:

We must realize that we no longer inherit the earth from our parents, we borrow it from our children.*

Go here to read the NCC faith principles.

To endorse these principles click here.



* R.B.J. Walker, One World, Many Worlds: Struggles for a Just World Peace (London, U.K.: Zed Books; Boudler, CO: Lynne Rienner, 1998), 101. Cited in Fernandez, Reimagining the Human, 160

9 June: designs

8 June: city by the bay

7 June: through a window

Message from FaithfulAmerica.org

Dear HAT:

Here's a chance to make a difference in the fight against global warming. On Thursday, June 7th, the Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church, Katharine Jefferts Schori, will testify before the Senate Environment and Public Works Committee about our common call to protect God's creation from the damage of global warming. This is the first time that the Senate has asked to hear from the faith community on this issue, and we are asking you to take action. Your legislators need to hear your support for the prophetic voice of our faith leaders. As people of faith and conscience, we are called to be responsible stewards of God's creation and join in the restoration of the world's brokenness. God's beloved earth is being damaged by human-caused global warming, and now is a critical time for us to sow a vision of a more sustainable society and address global warming.

Here are two ways for you to take action:

1) First, pick up the phone! Call your Senators and Representatives and ask them to support legislation that will halt global warming and restore integrity to creation:

Dial 1-888-784-0527 to reach the Capitol switchboard. Ask the operator to connect you to your Senator's/Representative's office to determine your Representatives and Senators. Ask to leave a message for the Senator/Representative. Feel free to use and/or adapt the following script:

My name is ______ and I am calling from Berkeley, CA. I would like to urge Senator/Representative _______ to support legislation that will take bold steps to curb global warming and prevent its harmful effects on the world's most vulnerable people. As a person of faith, I believe that God calls us to protect the integrity of creation, especially when global warming will affect those living in poverty the most. I ask that the Senator/Representative support 15-20% reductions in carbon emissions by 2020 and 80% reductions by 2050, and also support an effective energy bill that will move us toward this goal. Thank you for your time.

2) Second, endorse the Faith Principles on Global Warming by our friends at NCC Eco-justice.

Then send the following link to your clergy and faith community members and ask them to endorse it as well: www.nccecojustice.org/climateprinciples.html

This is a timely opportunity to let your elected officials know that you stand in solidarity with key faith leaders on the issue of global warming (or, as our friend Rabbi Arthur Waskow calls it, global scorching!)

Blessings to you as you speak on behalf of our planet,

Vince Isner,
FaithfulAmerica.org

06 June: concentricity

G8, The World Can't Wait. End Poverty Now.

5 June: moss on a tree

4 June: reflection upturned

Since I posted my photo so late in the day today, I'm trying to redeem myself by posting an extra photo to make up for the tardiness... This is a pic I took while gliding down the canal towards the Perfume Pagoda (Chua Huong) in Hanoi, Vietnam. While this is neither a summer photo nor a local photo, the stillness of the image evokes a sense of serenity that overcomes me during the summer months. In the church calendar, post Pentecost is the beginning of Ordinary Time, a time for growth and transitions. The images of the upturned boats (dingies? canoes?) remind me of all the work that has been done and all the work that remains undone. We are beginning a new time -- a time of ordinariness. I take satisfaction in this ordinariness because it is a time brimming with stilled potential. The woman behind the oars sits way outside of the lens and though I have several photos of her, she remains hidden out of sight. Without her, I would never have reached the mountain of Chua Huong. Without her hard labor of rowing one full hour to reach the caves and one full hour back to our starting point, we would not have seen the wonders of this region. She told me that each family in the town takes turns rowing tourists back and forth to Chua Huong -- and it is this business that keeps them alive. She tells me this is the work of substenance, not of the romantic, idealized tales that have been written about this perfumed pagoda. Her daily routines, though much more difficult and strenuous than mine, reminds me of the work that is yet to be done during these summer months, especially on these slow afternoons filled with sun and bees and breezes and flowers in bloom.

4 June: a glimpse of PSR

A glimpse of the Pacific School of Religion right here on holy hill in Berkeley.

3 June: small spark

In the mausoleum of King Tu Duc of the Nguyen Dynasty, who ruled from 1848 to 1883. His mausoleum was built between 1864-67. Tu Duc was buried in a secret location in Hue; the 200 laborers who buried him were beheaded after returning from a secret route. Tu Duc had over 100 wives and concubines but, being sterile after contracting smallpox, he never had any sons or daughters to inherit his legacy. Tu Duc spent much of his time here, and his adopted son was buried here after succeeding him for 7 mos.

2 June: through the tree: a mountainside

1st of June